I’d think you’d be better at accepting rejection by now

JohnIII1979
3/14/2014 8:29:23 AM
Hi sexy I like your pics wanto hang out sometime

soccergirl79
3/14/2014 10:13:24 AM
with you?

JohnIII1979
3/14/2014 10:32:51 AM
Yes

soccergirl79
3/14/2014 10:34:25 AM
no

JohnIII1979
3/14/2014 10:35:19 AM
Ok your loss

soccergirl79
3/14/2014 10:39:14 AM
i’ll survive

JohnIII1979
3/14/2014 10:40:06 AM
You are a nerd any way by

soccergirl79
3/14/2014 10:40:50 AM
but you want to fuck me, so maybe that says more about you than me.

JohnIII1979
3/14/2014 10:41:58 AM
I neaver sade anything about fucking you get lost

Reading is hard

My profile on cupid says you should message me if you abhor fox news. It works on two levels; identifying guys who get all their news from idiots and those who don’t know what the word abhor means…

Hi im kevin. youxsure are very beautiful.
Message from dojiwall
55% Match

Jan 31, 2014 – 4:47pm
I watch fox news every morning. Im scottish.
Message from dojiwall
55% Match

Jan 31, 2014 – 9:17pm
then it’s a shame that I abhor fox news
Sent to dojiwall
55% Match

Jan 31, 2014 – 9:28pm
yes, I watch channel 9 too. But I will stop watching fox news from now on I promise. I read it fast I thought it said I ador. Now you stop? lol
Message from dojiwall
55% Match

Jan 31, 2014 – 9:31pm
I wish it would snow?
Message from dojiwall
55% Match

Jan 31, 2014 – 9:37pm
no its not. (: (:
Message from dojiwall
55% Match

Jan 31, 2014 – 9:58pm
I want a reprive
Message from dojiwall
55% Match

Now please stop looking at my profile

Goodbye cupid

If any of you saved this link from my cupid profile and are wondering why I quit the site, I didn’t. They suspended/terminate both my real and fake profiles. Of course they were super mature and notified me that I had broken some term of the service agreement and therefore had to cancel my account. Ok, that last part was a big lie. Of course they didn’t notify me, the site is just having ‘technical difficulties’ which, according to google, is code for having had your account terminated.

Obviously run by a man 😉

I’m sure if you’ve read the ‘comments’ left by the goat, you must be wondering how I defamed him (eight months ago, btw). So here is my absolutely scathing post about him.

So, ah, then why are you on a dating website?

show a little skin…

Oct 3, 2013 – 10:50pm
Hello how are you
Message from TimboWest1

Oct 3, 2013 – 11:12pm
Yeah, you live in Florida and it seems we have nothing in common

Oct 3, 2013 – 11:13pm
I know I live in Florida

Oct 3, 2013 – 11:14pm
Congrats, you’re brilliant

———————————————————-

Oct 3, 2013 – 10:24pm
Damn girl….nice.
39% Enemy 39% Friend 47% Match Message from Capshead

Oct 3, 2013 – 10:25pm
yep

Oct 3, 2013 – 10:28pm
makes me wanna get a mouthful.
Oct 3, 2013 – 11:07pm
I wanna see more

Oct 3, 2013 – 11:11pm
I bet

Oct 3, 2013 – 11:13pm
larrycapsfan@yah@@
let me see more sexy.

Oct 3, 2013 – 11:14pm
Nah

——————————————————–

Oct 3, 2013 – 6:19pm
Wow I want that
22% Enemy 64% Friend 70% Match Message from jjonfire76

——————————————————–

Oct 3, 2013 – 5:34pm
You have delicious legs!
Message from OvPerdition

———————————————————-

Oct 2, 2013 – 10:45pm
Okay, I was lead here by the cleavage, but out of common courtesy, I read your profile AND checked out the lost brothers on YouTube. Not too shabby (that can be applied to all aforementioned items).
17% Enemy 73% Friend 66% Match Message from matt-in-point

Oct 2, 2013 – 10:56pm
worst compliments ever

Oct 2, 2013 – 10:59pm
All meant in a joking manner. Sorry if it offended, wasn’t my intention.

———————————————————

Sep 9, 2013 – 8:56pm
Hitting on your fake profile on the day of a scheduled date is epic. Kudos to that one. 😉
18% Enemy 33% Friend 73% Match Message from blkshadows_
Sep 9, 2013 – 8:57pm
Oh and for the record – snake rules.
Oct 2, 2013 – 10:35pm
Feel like grabbing a beer at neons and bullshitting the night away?

Oct 6, 2013 – 10:53pm
dude, are you saying snake was the best character on degrassi? no one thought archie simpsons was the best character 🙂

——————————————————–

Oct 1, 2013 – 11:22pm
I loved that, thank you
33% Enemy 12% Friend 45% Match Message from 46203

——————————————————-

Sep 30, 2013 – 10:54pm
still as hot as ever.
33% Enemy 50% Friend 67% Match Message from bratpacksdad

Sep 30, 2013 – 10:56pm
you must have missed the really good pics i had up the last couple of days

If I don’t respond…

Quit f*cking messaging me!

Sep 29, 2013 – 1:06am
It sucks being at home alone on Saturday night don’t it. : c
26% Enemy 52% Friend 59% Match Message from Charlie46173

Sep 29, 2013 – 7:04am
I bought a little radio controlled helicopter yesterday it doesn’t last very long but that’s what you get for only $30 fun for a couple seconds LoL

Sep 29, 2013 – 7:41am
Is ATP in your profile tennis
And what is a crew match
Do you like UFC fights?

Oct 1, 2013 – 6:21am
Why did you take that pic down ??

Oct 2, 2013 – 6:30pm
What does a gorgeous woman like you look for in a man ??

Beware the fake profile

Selected text and dating site conversations from the latest douchebag
Him Fri 9/6
I have not gone on any dates for over 6 months. By choice because I have been working on myself (I now highly doubt this). I am NOT talking to any other girls right now (I think we’ll see in a minute that this isn’t the case), I am concentrating on you (and your desire for dirty pictures). Like I said I am a gentleman, & I like to treat a woman right. With respect (I think we use different dictionaries). I also expect the same from the woman that I am dating. because I am worth that, and the woman that I am dating/pursuing is worth that as well. When it comes to meeting, I take the approach that sooner is better. I would meet you tomorrow if you wanted to.

Him Sat 9/7
Sounds perfect. I’d be up for meeting you tonight, but I promised my sister I’d come over. I haven’t seen her in a couple of months…..still tomorrow is a lot better than waiting months, right? 🙂

Me late afternoon Sun 9/8
What do you want to do tonight? (should have been my first clue that we were talking on and off throughout the day without him bringing up going out that night)

Him Sun 9/8
I don’t know (I then sent some joking message about him putting a lot of thought into the night, but didn’t push the issue)

Him Sun 9/8
I’ve been away from my phone. Sorry, something personal came up….. I don’t want to start off with lies (ha ha), so I promise that isn’t an excuse (sure). Sorry for the short notice too (I’m guessing you knew the whole time we were talking today that you didn’t want to go out)!! Ugh. Don’t give up on me, or be mad at me (Fuck you). I promise I will make it up to you. Consider this my one screw up (but screw up 2 would come within hours).

Him to my fake cupid profile Sun 9/8 I did click on his profile, but didn’t make first contact
Sep 8, 2013 – 8:52pm
Hey there. How are youuuu?

Sep 8, 2013 – 9:01pm
i’m good. how are you?

Sep 8, 2013 – 9:11pm
I’m doing well. Just relaxing at home for the rest of the night because I have to be awake at 7am. I would like to get to know you. Maybe you will allow me to see a picture of you smiling….maybe with some better lighting. 🙂

Me via text to see if he was smart enough to put 2 and 2 together Sun 9/8
I assume its nothing serious since you have time to hit on my fake cupid profile

Me via fake cupid profile after no text response Sun 9/8
Sep 8, 2013 – 9:12pm
glad to know you don’t have anything personal preventing you from going out tonight

Sep 8, 2013 – 9:14pm
Tricky tricky.

Sep 8, 2013 – 9:14pm
asshole asshole

Sep 8, 2013 – 9:16pm
Geez. I still planned on meeting you. ASAP, but I just didn’t feel like going out tonight. Some things did come up, but they didn’t take that much time to resolve.
So I wasn’t lying (except about not talking to any other girls, which he volunteered, I didn’t ask, nor would I expect someone I’ve never met before to not be talking to other women on a dating site). If I just said I didn’t feel like going out tonight you would have been a lot more mad at me (Um no, I wouldn’t and since you don’t know me, don’t presume to know what I would prefer).

Him via my real cupid profile Sun 9/8
Sep 8, 2013 – 9:24pm
Well, I know who I’m talking to, so I’m not really hitting on a fake profile. I am simply messaging a girl I know through the profile with a picture of girl that I don’t know. I see what you did….you lured me in. You have established that any deception will be detected by you. It won’t happen again. I really don’t deceive or lie very often at all (Cause who would admit that they are a liar and cheat?). I certainly don’t want the foundation of something potentially substantial to be initiated with lies, deceit, or anything negative. I apologize (Actions speak louder than words).

Sep 8, 2013 – 9:25pm
I didn’t lure you in. that would be if i sent you an actual message. all i did was click on your profile. if you want to talk, please text me

Him via text Sun 9/8
You’re right, the profile wasn’t very good. the picture looked nice, & I thought maybe I could get to know her through messaging, or through a phone call……but she’s fake…..again I do apologize (Great, you’re apologizing for being ‘lured’ in by a fake profile, not for lying to me).

Me, stupidly giving him a second chance Sun 9/8
Well if you actually want to meet then you can ask me out in advance with a specific day time and place (I am such a demanding bitch!)

Him Sun 9/8
It was only because I looked at my visitors and saw that girl and thought to myself “she’s cute, maybe she is a cool & intelligent person too.” I saw that our percentages were horrible & I noticed that her profile sucked, but I thought “maybe she’s new.” So I messaged her to see what her story was (again, you’re apologixing for being stupid, not for lying to me. Geez, as I reread this conversation I realize I’m the moron for even giving him a second chance). I can’t blame you for being careful, and instances like this make you want to be more careful I’m certain. I still would lite a chance to sure you that I’m a decent and respectful guy.

Him Sun 9/8
Sorry again for wasting any of your time. I’ll redeem myself, you’ll see. I like being seen as a man of my word (whether you are or not). Good night & Sweet dreams.

Me Wed 9/11
Gonna ask me out for this weekend before I make other plans:)?

Him Wed 9/11
What are you doing Friday?

Me Wed 9/11
Nothing as of right now

Him Wed 9/11
Let’s meet!

Me Wed 9/11
C’mon, you know you gotta be more specific than that:)

Me 2 hours later Wed 9/11
You are very frustrating:) good night

Him almost midnight Wed 9/11
Are you really getting shitty? I’m at work (sure you are).

Me late Wed/early Thurs 9/11
I just would have thought after this weekend you would have already asked me out and had something in mind to do

So there it is. Asking to be properly asked out and wanting a guy to be a man and think of something to do on a date(not creative, a restaurant or bar to meet at) is too much trouble. He probably had a better offer, or found a girl who believes his bullshit.
This is why I’m going back to my instincts of being a bitch. If this guy was actually interested and he put in this little effort when he should be trying to impress me, imagine how he acts in a relationship when he doesn’t feel the need to actually put in any effort. Maybe he’s been alone for six months because women are too intelligent to put up with his bullshit, or maybe he’s just a fucking liar. Who cares

And just who is this fake vixen I’ve created that lure men in? God, she must be the coolest chick ever
Ethnicity
—
Height
—
Body Type
—
Diet
—
Smokes
—
Drinks
—
Drugs
Never
Religion
—
Sign
—
Education
—
Job
—
Income
—
Offspring
—
Pets
_
Speaks
English

My self-summary
i like to read, write, dance and have fun
What I’m doing with my life
working hard, playing harder
I’m really good at
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
The six things I could never do without
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I spend a lot of time thinking about
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
On a typical Friday night I am
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I’m looking for

Guys who like girls
Ages 24–44
Near me
For long-term dating, short-term dating

You should message me if
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!

Oh, yes. It does come complete with one dark picture of a woman with long hair

The profile of a stalker

My self-summary
Why does this have to be so hard (answer: it doesnt ! )

Must be: outgoing, talkative, somewhat responsible, like to go places in town, willing to put up with me, like to travel to Canada / have passport or will get one. Must be able to drive. I’m pretty flexible and easy to date.

(really, you’re easy to date? That’s a whole lot of musts…)

Bonus: likes guitar tab books, ice cream sandwiches, 80s hard rock, retro video games like SNES, and sushi, and church, plum wine, china buffets that have sushi., Kings Island gold pass holder

Me: never been married, late bloomer, 38, live by Eastgate mall in a nice bi-level house with spacious deck and grilling out and soon to be hottub.. Have a great cat. Must not have dogs at this time as my cat desnt play well with others. Hoping to start a family and be in a long term relationship. I make good money have a stable job, Im someone to settle down with. Cant find my true partner. Like to hang out in Mt. Lookout at Ichiban and Eden park etc. Write me for more. Kids OK 🙂
What I’m doing with my life
Waiting to start a family (instant is OK). Just a professional – enjoying cincinnati and looking to be in a relationship.
I’m really good at
technology items, keeping busy doing nothing, shopping at guitar center
(you forgot getting pre engaged/engaged)
The first things people usually notice about me
I look pretty normal and ruggedly handsome. Broad shoulders
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Comedies such as American pie or THis is 40
(really? these are two of your favorite movies? of all time?)
Like classic hard rock from 80s/90s.. grunge.. went to Rock on the Range this year.. Sushi, sushi, sushi – preferrably in Mt. Lookout
(moron, you don’t live in mt lookout)
The six things I could never do without
my family and cat,
Jesus,
my house and cvic SI
my vintage Gibson les paul custom (black)
my deck and grill,
rock music and retro video games
I spend a lot of time thinking about
whether I am far along i my life, should I have kids, where am I going.. will I find someone who can love me.
On a typical Friday night I am
getting home from work and popping in a super nintendo game or calling my friends to make plans for the weekend. Doing laundry and dishes.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I snore sometimes and sometimes smack my lips when I eat. (working on it)
I’m looking for

Girls who like guys
Ages 25–45
Near me
Who are single
For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

You should message me if
want to meet a great guy. Tired of games.

(I don’t think jesus would approve of stalkers. And for those of you not living near me, eastgate and mt lookout aren’t exactly next to each other. But hey, I know what sushi place to avoid now.)

Well sweetie

Occasional smoker with average bod type
43 year old Man, 6′ 4″ (193cm), Non-Religious
Caucasian Capricorn with Mixed color hair
tim859e1 isn’t seeking a relationship or any kind of commitment. (strike 1)
Education High School (strike 2)
Personality Night Owl
Profession security

I am Seeking a Woman For Dating
Do you drink? Socially
Do you want children? Undecided
Marital Status Single
Do you do drugs? No
Eye Color Blue
Do you have a car? N/A (strike 3, but lets read on, shall we?)
Do you have children? No
Longest Relationship Over 4 years
Second Language English

About tim
Well(1) I like putting model cars together (why) I like rock and roll music well(2) I am shy until u get to know me I want a women that loves to have her man be good to her (punctuation, look it up)

First Date
Well I’m looking for a women that loves to have her box eat out and loves to please her man in every way and will take care of her man That’ll teach me to keep reading after strike three.

Let’s see how charming this guy is via message
tim859e1
8/13/2013 11:34:27 PM
Very nice pictures sweetie pie(1)

soccergirl79
8/13/2013 11:36:00 PM
Well I can’t say the same for you

tim859e1
8/13/2013 11:37:30 PM
I’m putting one up tomorrow will u still want to talk(a question?)
tim859e1
8/13/2013 11:41:30 PM
I guess u don’t want to talk to me
tim859e1
8/13/2013 11:44:33 PM
Have u looked at my profile

soccergirl79
8/13/2013 11:49:41 PM
yes, that’s why i started my response with the word ‘well.’ and i’d be much more likely to have a conversation with you if you could be bothered to talk about things we have in common, rather than my pics-pretty ironic you mention them when you don’t have any on your profile

tim859e1
8/13/2013 11:56:08 PM
I promise I will put one up tomorrow sweetheart(2)
tim859e1
8/13/2013 11:59:08 PM
Sweetheart(3) I won’t hurt u

soccergirl79
8/14/2013 12:22:08 AM
please stop calling me sweetheart. and i’m hardly worried about you hurting me

tim859e1
8/14/2013 12:23:09 AM
Sorry I know u don’t want to talk to me

soccergirl79
8/14/2013 12:26:04 AM
you’re right-no car or not allowed to drive, uneducated and this is the best you can come up with for a first date idea ‘Well I’m looking for a women that loves to have her box eat out’ probably a good idea not to show your face

Why me, God?
oh wait, update.

tim859e1
8/14/2013 12:34:31 AM
I know u would think I’m ugly any way so u like girls

yes, I’m a lesbian because I don’t like YOUR profile and I don’t like being talked to like your five year old niece. Nice to know he’s both depressed and has low self-esteem, as well as apparently thinking any woman not interested in him must be gay.

Did ya happen to read my profile?

8upfun: what up (red flag/dealbreaker 1)

Non-smoker with undisclosed body type
32 year old Man, 5′ 10″ (178cm)
Non-Religious
Caucasian Capricorn with Black hair
8upfun is looking for a relationship.
Education High School
Personality Class Clown (Yeah, not really into an uneducated jokester)
Profession open (NOT a f*cking profession)

I am Seeking a Woman For Long term
Do you drink? Prefer not to say (Hmmm,I wonder what that means?)
Do you want children? Prefer not to say
Marital Status Single
Do you do drugs? No
Do you have a car? N/A (for the love of God, POF, you need to require people to give an explanation when they say no or n/a to this question)
Do you have children? No
Longest Relationship Over 4 years

About Me
I enjoy the outdoors mudding camping I will try anything once if you like what you hear hit me up (wow, such a diverse list of interests and command of the english language)
First Date
up to u (lucky girl)

8upfun
8/8/2013 1:36:32 PM
Hi (I know my profile used a lot of words, and that can be time consuming and intimidating, but I’m pretty sure I stated in all caps, my dislike for this type of initial email)
8upfun
8/8/2013 3:40:19 PM
I love the top (After I reread my initial thoughts on this email, I began to rethink my interpretation of this comment. I originally thought it was a comment on sexual positions since the pic is me laying in bed, although I’m fully clothed. But maybe he’s referring to the shirt I’m wearing in my pic. Which is to say he’s commenting on my boobs. Yep I’m a woman, therefor I have breasts. Deal with it)
8upfun
8/8/2013 3:42:55 PM
So (Holy shit, is he trying to say that those opening lines have actually worked on other women? I feel sad for my gender)

soccergirl79
8/8/2013 4:02:47 PM
are you really expecting a response?

8upfun
8/8/2013 4:03:12 PM
Yes (It’s my own fault for assuming he’d understand the implications of my question)

soccergirl79
8/8/2013 4:11:51 PM
sorry, not really liking what I hear

8upfun
8/8/2013 4:49:56 PM
😦
I’m sure he’ll get over it

He who calls himself sexy and smart is most likely neither

SexySmartGuy: Crushed Red Peppers
What’s worse than a stupid user name? A title that either makes no sense or is some obscure reference that no one will get
About           Non-smoker with Athletic body type          
Details           42 year old Man, 5′ 10″ (178cm),
Non-Religious        
Ethnicity     Caucasian Virgo with Mixed color hair   hmmm, the pics i saw implied he’s bald
Intent           SexySmartGuy wants to date but nothing serious.      

Education     Some college
Free Thinker        

Profession     Bussiness

I am Seeking a     Woman        
For     Dating
Do you drink?     I do not drink        
Do you want children?     Prefer not to say
Marital Status     Single        
Do you do drugs?     No
Eye Color     Blue
Do you have a car?     Yes        
Do you have children?     No
Longest Relationship     Over 8 years

    
EXERCISE                      talking                      Movies
Coffee House               dinner                      shopping
music                            Picnic                       park
concerts                       auctions
flea markets                yard sales                writting
Reading                       sex                           eating 85% pure dark chocolate (huh?)
Debating Subjects  (could ‘ya vague that up for me?)                                                              fishing                         Travel
lifting weights

About Clay
I’m not looking for anything serious. I really don’t feel that I need to be in a committed relationship…(yes red flag, I see you clearly) If we qualify for each other (if we qualify for each other?)than we can take it from there… I can be a selfish person at times (if I was not that would defy nature) and can seem like a ***hole ( so be it)(yes red flag, I also hear you screaming at me). I know what I want from a women and really no longer interested in being the soul provider in a relationship.(Hmmm, do I think he meant to go with soul, as in bearing his heart and soul to his partner and not getting the same in return? Or do I go with my initial instinct that he really meant sole and he’s just a moron?) Like I said I can be selfish and I can be an ***hole. I’m looking to make myself happy and I’m not interested in making a women the center of my world (Hey, can’t say he didn’t warn you). I’m a hard man to please.(Not if a woman does whatever the frack you want without regards to her needs, desires and opinions) I won’t fall in love with just anybody and I don’t want to spend my valuable time with someone I know I have no interest in being around. (Um yeah, that’s why you date someone-to see if you are compatible)

First Date
If we both decide on a first date.(Hi. Not a sentence.) We would have to decide on both of our interest.(Hi, not a coherent sentence. And I prefer doing something on a date that neither I nor my date actually enjoys. Then we can bond over our mutual hatred of what we’re doing) Normally, it’ll consist of a formal dinner and a movie of choice.(Really, I get a say in any part of the date? Or do you tell me which movies you’re willing to see and i can choose from any of those movies? Why am I having flashbacks to bad wedding invitations? A formal dinner followed by a movie of choice sounds like the dinner/dessert description) If dinner, or movie is not that particular woman’s idea of a good first date 9which what women does not like to go out & eat / movie date). (Crap, another incoherent sentence, but I’m pretty sure he’s saying he can’t imagine what woman wouldn’t put out after dinner and a movie, because, what could be more interesting or creative than dinner and a movie for a first date? Hmmm, let me go with ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!! Although, to be fair, I doubt I’d want to try and make small talk with this guy for a couple of hours).It can be anything from a walk on a beach, a venue (pretty sure he doesn’t know what the word venue means), picnic at a park, or just a relaxing time sitting in a coffee house chatting.

Oh yeah, sign me up